In spite of all of the bad economic news, Valley gays are giving pro-family groups a reason to smile. The 2009 Phoenix Pride Festival will sashay into Steele Indian School Park this Saturday giving activists from groups like Americans for Truth About Homosexuality plenty of opportunities to capture footage of scantily-clad revelers in a variety of suggestive situations, to be later edited into  videos with captions like Could This Be Your Child’s Teacher? that will be distributed to righteously indignant church members.

The official start of the nationwide traveling carnival of gay debauchery festivals happens right here in Phoenix (believe me, we wouldn’t want to have it in July). While gays in New York and Boston are still wearing jackets over their “bad angel” and “naughty nun” outfits, Valley gays will be drinking, dancing, and validating every trite stereotype about homosexuals all weekend long.

If you are sensing a touch of cynical bitterness in my voice, it is because I have avoided going to these weekend-long feasts of debauchery up until this point, but out of a sense of duty to my readers, I will be attending the festivities this weekend to provide a full report.

As a kid, I saw the gay pride shockumentaries that were intended to frighten my still-malleable mind about the evils of gaydom, so in one respect I feel like I have already been to a dozen Gay Prides.

If you want to join me there, here are the details:

When

Parade: Saturday, April 18 – step off at 11 a.m.
Festival: Saturday April 18 and Sunday April 19, from 12 p.m. to 9 p.m.

Where

Parade: Route travels along Third Street from Thomas Road to Indian School Road
Festival: Steele Indian School Park, Third Street and Indian School RoadCheck www.phoenixpride.org for maps, light rail and parking information)

Cost

Parade: FREE
Festival: single-day passes can be purchased for $15, or weekend passes for $25 either online at www.phoenixpride.org, at the gate (cash only – ATMs onsite) or at several downtown Phoenix locations. Children under 12 admitted FREE.

More info

For maps, light rail and parking information, check out phoenixpride.org.